Monday, February 8, 2010

At first he seemed sweet, but then he turned out to be a psycho

So before I continue with the story, the story that really isn't mine, I must talk about the party Saturday night.

Avy does know how to throw a party. Her humble abode was filled with pretty girls, good-looking boys, champagne and pixie dust. I brought Signe. As a way to celebrate her birthday and get her out of the house. She needed cheering up, and she needed cake. You should see how skinny she is. I would have liked to stuff her full of Twinkies and french fries, but I made her a vegan cake, so she would eat some.
Anyway, she used to date this guy Benjamin. At first he seemed sweet, but then he turned out to be a psycho. Sounds familiar?
He crashed the party. I don't know how he knew about it, but just after midnight he walked in.
I don't know how many gin and tonics I had had, but I was having a swell time. Miri was also there, and that girl is trouble. She's a lot of fun to hang out with, but something about her worries me.

Anyway, I started chatting up Benjamin. It was easy, I just asked questions and got him talking about his favorite subject; himself. Every now and then his eyes searched the room. I fed him champagne and compliments. I don't understand what Signe ever saw in him. His breath smelled like raw sewage, an extension of his soul, perhaps? But I still wanted to test out my pretty power. I begun to lean in closer. I found short-cuts to skin contact. Until I had my knee in his crotch. He put his paw in my hair. And pulled my head towards his lips. Toxic fumes engulfed me. Last minute I dodged his kiss, and gave him a peck on the cheek. He pulled me down onto a couch.

Did you really think I wanted to do you, man-whore? I said.

Signe was right there. She jumped up on the couch and started yelling that she was looking down on him. I wished she had kicked him in the teeth. But instead she trashed around and broke a vase. Like most things in life it was an accident. The vase was crystal. There was blood. I was dizzy. Benjamin cursing me out with his dragon breath.

And then this other girl, Aurora, collapsed and an ambulance had to come get her. I think she probably spent too much time in the bathroom.

I developed a pre-mature headache and was overcome by existential angst. The kind I get when I think about the fact that we're all going to die. 

10 comments:

  1. what a supriese... Benjamin is ALWAYS making trouble.. Isn`t he?

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  2. i read your blog and all your friends' blogs and i realize how far removed i am from your world. instead of partying w. pixie dust and gin and tonics (gin and tonics = definite yum and i'm not even certain if by pixie dust your speaking metaphorically or talking about some sort of drug. i am seriously that lame). i'm currently feeding a baby, eating oatmeal and watching my two dogs fight for a toy underneath the play pen. i'm not sure if it's the twilight zone here or where you live...

    but either way i am certainly entertained by your writing.

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  3. He seemed sweet but turned out to be a psycho, sounds like a familiar story.
    Cleo x

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  4. "His breath smelled like raw sewage, an extension of his soul, perhaps?"

    i shall be using this and quoting you on it.

    you brighten my day with your exciting life my darling.

    never stop.

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  5. 'And then this other girl, Aurora, collapsed and an ambulance had to come get her. I think she probably spent too much time in the bathroom.'

    this line was absolutely perfect in every way.
    the bathroom will definitely get you if you aren't careful.
    i know its way too true.

    and hearts,
    dusty rose

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  6. That's crazy stuff. Man-whore is right.

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  7. Quite some party. Very interesting

    Much love,
    Sophia
    http://apoetscircus.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete

You Rock. I am certain of it.