Tuesday, March 2, 2010

how can I tell this without seeming like a total douchebag or a lunatic?

There are certain things that scare me. Of course. I don't like the shape of forks for example, and darkness can be eerie sometimes. But I am scared of axe murderers, sadistic rapists and rabid dogs rather than ghosts or spirits. Despite having a total angry New Age-man for a father, I've never had any religious leanings. But I have been thinking, at weak and desperate times, that it would be nice to believe in something other than that we'll all die now or grow older.

Yesterday evening dad and I went to a yoga class in Alpine, about half an hour north of Marfa. It wasn't my idea. Then we went to eat at the Reata Steakhouse. I gave into my carnivore urges and ordered steak. It was so rare it stained my shirt. I had really begun to wonder what this trip was all about, and the disappointment started to coagulate and harden into miniature fists inside me. I was looking away, looking bored, drinking my ice tea when dad told me we had an appointment with a healer and that we'd had to get going.

Again, driving south and turning onto a bumpy dirt road that seemed to lead us to the edge of earth or to a grave of quicksand.

And I kept getting angrier, because I kept thinking we were going to turn up at some red-haired hippie lady's house, and that dad would wanna do her and I would be left listening to the last sounds I wanted to hear.

Finally a faint glow appeared and then a modest house, that turned out to be completely powered by solar panels. A young guy, maybe thirty or so, came out on the porch to greet us. His name was Craig.

First we drank tea, then we ... how can I tell this without seeming like a total douchebag or a lunatic?

Let me just tell you this. For the first time I wasn't trying to meditate; I was meditating. And unless there was some chemicals in the tea Craig offered us, I was experiencing a natural high that sparkled and pulsated hot lava up and down my spine, making little supernovas go off all around me.

I fell asleep during the ride back to Marfa, with a big smile pasted across my face. The last thing I felt was the back of daddy's hand softly touching my cheek.

p.s took the photo of myself in the bathroom just as we got back.


  1. That is SO cool! I've had readings before and they've always been eerily accurate, and I astral-projected once but wasn't able to do it again. I'm glad you shared your experiences! :)

    And I recommend a Unitarian-Universalist church. People there are from all different religions, including aethiests and agnostics, and it's very accepting, a real sense of community. Plus you can study all different types of religious paths, and you might find something that resonates with you. And the people are really cool! :)

  2. So meditation is a real thing...

  3. That does sound rather, I don't want to say 'cool', but you know what I mean, interesting doesn't really sum it up, I want to have a go! x.

  4. nice trip.. glad you didn't have to hear that spl entry soundtrack courtesy you dad. i am quite the green-no carbon footprint nut. so all these solar panel thingies really interest me. i really don't know how yoga and steaks balance out. all the hard cores i know are hard core veggies too . but i have always been interested in stuff like that. how long have you been doing it for?

  5. i am a total believer in energy healing. i've had it done quite a few times and if they are good, you can really feel this tingling, warm sensation. it's crazy. i have been calmed down through panic attacks by healers, which i didn't think could ever happen without meds. it's great stuff. i have had a lot of healers tell me that i am a clairvoyant and i need to tap into that so i can heal others. i just need to step through all my shit first. you don't sound crazy at all.

    and i love that you posted a photo of yourself!!


  6. sometimes these magical things happen. you're not a douchebag or a lunatic. didn't i say something on your last post about reorienting? crap, i don't remember. probably it would apply here though.

    also. in regards to your comment which has been making me smile all morning. the feeling is mutual, mon amie. only it's your words, not garnet-colored hair, that is food for my soul.

    will you please come back home please? you are too wonderful to not be in close proximity to.

    also your hair color is SPLENDID.

    xx x

  7. love this story, Kim. very well-written as always. i really like the way you described the moment after you met Craig. very dramatic and inspiring. i wish i could write that kind of description, too.

  8. Very cool. Glad it worked for you!

  9. Starcake; yes! you should.
    Neverfit; thanks for your advice. XXX
    yes, it's the real thing.
    Nitin, I don't think yoga and steak really goes together. i don't think steaks go with anything really ...
    see, I know what you mean.
    Melissa and Vinda; thanks sweet ladies!
    Anise and Apparellel, you know who you are!

  10. I astral-projected once but wasn't able to do it again. I'm glad you shared your experiences!

    your healthy choice

  11. sounds so awesome!! im going to yoga in an hour, its the highlight of my day!


You Rock. I am certain of it.