Monday, April 5, 2010
You will find me making voodoo dolls. You'll find me drinking JD straight outta bottle.
But have you ever thought about reinventing yourself? Shedding skin? Coming out shiny and new?
I have become another person. When I come home (read: if I come home) you may not recognize me. And it's not because my hair color changed or because I gained or lost weight.
I get up early. I work as a waitress. I take walks in the park. I don't drive anywhere. I drink Apfelshorle. I signed up for Deutsch classes.
But keeping the darkness at bay is a full-time job even for a cheerful person like me. When I let the guard down an unexplored part of the gray scale blindfolds me. And that black hole makes me a little lopsided. And then the vertigo comes.
You will find me making voodoo dolls. You'll find me drinking JD straight outta bottle. You'll find me stoned and playing scrabble. With myself. Because I am a sore loser. Don't ever take me on a mini-golf date. You'll find me speeding down Mullholland Drive, momentarily intoxicated by the SoCal beauty, but mostly not caring about the outcome. My outcome.
But now I suddenly have a job. As a waitress. I've never done it before. But this American lady, Sandy, hired me for her American-style restaurant.
I like working. It's sort of new to me.